Dreiser Theodore Fullscreen American Tragedy (1925)

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“For de love o’ Mike, will you listen to dat, now,” exclaimed Hegglund, deprecatingly.

“He’s goin’ to begin on Rhine wine.

And him dat likes Manhattans always.

What’s gettin’ into you all of a sudden, Tommy?

I t’ought you said you wanted a good time to- night.”

“So I do,” replied Ratterer, “but can’t I have a good time without lappin’ up everything in the place?

I want to stay sober to-night. No more call-downs for me in the morning, if I know what I’m about.

I came pretty near not showing up last time.”

“That’s true, too,” exclaimed Arthur Kinsella.

“I don’t want to drink so much I don’t know where I’m at, but I’m not going to begin worrying about it now.”

“How about you, Higby?” Hegglund now called to the round-eyed youth.

“I’m having a Manhattan, too,” he replied, and then, looking up at the waiter who was beside him, added, “How’s tricks, Dennis?”

“Oh, I can’t complain,” replied the waiter.

“They’re breakin’ all right for me these days.

How’s everything over to the hotel?”

“Fine, fine,” replied Higby, cheerfully, studying the bill-of-fare.

“An’ you, Griffiths?

What are you goin’ to have?” called Hegglund, for, as master-of-ceremonies, delegated by the others to look after the orders and pay the bill and tip the waiter, he was now fulfilling the role.

“Who, me?

Oh, me,” exclaimed Clyde, not a little disturbed by this inquiry, for up to now — this very hour, in fact — he had never touched anything stronger than coffee or ice-cream soda. He had been not a little taken back by the brisk and sophisticated way in which these youths ordered cocktails and whisky.

Surely he could not go so far as that, and yet, so well had he known long before this, from the conversation of these youths, that on such occasions as this they did drink, that he did not see how he could very well hold back.

What would they think of him if he didn’t drink something?

For ever since he had been among them, he had been trying to appear as much of a man of the world as they were.

And yet back of him, as he could plainly feel, lay all of the years in which he had been drilled in the “horrors” of drink and evil companionship.

And even though in his heart this long while he had secretly rebelled against nearly all the texts and maxims to which his parents were always alluding, deeply resenting really as worthless and pointless the ragamuffin crew of wasters and failures whom they were always seeking to save, still, now he was inclined to think and hesitate.

Should he or should he not drink?

For the fraction of an instant only, while all these things in him now spoke, he hesitated, then added:

“Why, I, oh — I think I’ll take Rhine wine and seltzer, too.”

It was the easiest and safest thing to say, as he saw it.

Already the rather temperate and even innocuous character of Rhine wine and seltzer had been emphasized by Hegglund and all the others.

And yet Ratterer was taking it — a thing which made his choice less conspicuous and, as he felt, less ridiculous.

“Will you listen to dis now?” exclaimed Hegglund, dramatically.

“He says he’ll have Rhine wine and seltzer, too.

I see where dis party breaks up at half-past eight, all right, unless some of de rest of us do someting.”

And Davis Higby, who was far more trenchant and roistering than his pleasant exterior gave any indication of, turned to Ratterer and said:

“Whatja want to start this Rhine wine and seltzer stuff for, so soon, Tom?

Dontcha want us to have any fun at all to-night?”

“Well, I told you why,” said Ratterer.

“Besides, the last time I went down to that joint I had forty bucks when I went in and not a cent when I came out.

I want to know what’s goin’ on this time.”

“That joint,” thought Clyde on hearing it.

Then, after this supper, when they had all drunk and eaten enough, they were going down to one of those places called a “joint”— a bad-house, really.

There was no doubt of it — he knew what the word meant.

There would be women there — bad women — evil women.

And he would be expected — could he — would he?

For the first time in his life now, he found himself confronted by a choice as to his desire for the more accurate knowledge of the one great fascinating mystery that had for so long confronted and fascinated and baffled and yet frightened him a little.

For, despite all his many thoughts in regard to all this and women in general, he had never been in contact with any one of them in this way.

And now — now —

All of a sudden he felt faint thrills of hot and cold racing up and down his back and all over him.

His hands and face grew hot and then became moist — then his cheeks and forehead flamed. He could feel them.