They tied the dog to the kitchen table and Blahnik described how he had purloined it.
'I went purposefuily past it and held the boiled liver wrapped up in paper.
It began to sniff and to jump up on me.
I didn't give it anything, but just walked on, the dog following me.
By the park I turned into Bredovska Street and there I gave it its first piece.
It ate it while it was going along so as not to lose sight of me.
I turned into Jindrisska Street, where I gave it another portion.
And when it'd eaten that up, I put it on a chain and dragged it through Wenceslas Square to Vinohrady and then on to Vrsovice.
On the way it played me some fantastic tricks.
When I crossed the tram lines it lay down and wouldn't move. Perhaps it wanted to be run over. I've brought with me a blank pedigree, which I bought at Fuchs the stationers.
Do you know how to forge the pedigree, Svejk?'
'It must be written in your hand.
Write that the dog comes from the kennels of von Bulow at Leipzig.
Its father was Arnheim von Kahlsberg, its mother Emma von Trautensdorf, descended on the father's side from Siegfried von Busenthal.
Its father won the first prize at the Berlin Exhibition of stable pinschers in 191 z.
The mother was decorated with the gold medal of the Nuremberg society for the breeding of thoroughbred dogs.
How old do you think it is?'
'Two years by its teeth.'
'Write down that it's one and a half.'
'It's badly cropped, Svejk.
Look at its ears.'
'We can put that right.
We can if necessary clip them when it gets used to us.
Now it could only make it more angry.'
The stolen animal growled furiously, panted, rushed around and then lay down. With tongue hanging out it waited, tired and exhausted, to see what was going to happen to it next.
Gradually it grew calmer and only occasionally whined piteously.
Svejk offered it the remains of the liver, which Blahnik had given him.
But it took no notice of it, gave it a defiant look and gazed at it as though it meant to say:
'I burnt my fingers once. You can eat it yourselves.'
It lay down in resignation and pretended to doze. Suddenly it got something into its head, jumped up and began to stand on its hind legs and beg with its front paws.
It had capitulated.
But this moving scene had no effect on Svejk.
'Lie down,' he shouted at the wretched animal, which lay down again and whined piteously.
'What name shall I put on its pedigree?' asked Blahnik.'
It was called Fox, so we must find something like it, which it will understand at once.'
'Why not perhaps" Max"?
Look, Blahnik, how it pricks up its ears.
Get up, Max!'
The unfortunate stable pinscher, which had been robbed of its home and name, stood up and waited for further orders.
'I think we ought to untie it,' Svejk decided.
'We shall see what it'll do then.'
When it was untied, it made its way to the door, where it barked three times at the handle, obviously relying on the generosity of these evil men.
Seeing however that they had no understanding for its yearning to get out, it made a little pool by the door, convinced that they would throw it out as people used to do to it when it was young and the colonel was teaching it in a strict military fashion to be housetrained.
Instead Svejk observed:
'It's a cunning one, to be sure, a bit of a Jesuit.'
He gave it a blow with his belt and dipped its muzzle in the puddle, so that it had a hard time licking itself clean.
It whined at this humiliation and began to run round the kitchen, desperately sniffing at its own tracks.
Then out of the blue it went to the table, ate up the rest of the liver which was lying on the floor, lay down near the stove and fell asleep after all this adventure.
'How much do I owe you?' Svejk asked Blahnik, when the latter took his leave of him.
'Don't mention it, Svejk,' said Blahnik gently. ' For an old friend I'd do anything, especially when he's serving in the army.