In the dim arrested light that struggled through the cream-coloured silk blinds, the face appeared to him to be a little changed.
The expression looked different. One would have said that there was a touch of cruelty in the mouth.
It was certainly strange.
He turned round, and, walking to the window, drew up the blind.
The bright dawn flooded the room, and swept the fantastic shadows into dusky corners, where they lay shuddering.
But the strange expression that he had noticed in the face of the portrait seemed to linger there, to be more intensified even.
The quivering, ardent sunlight showed him the lines of cruelty round the mouth as clearly as if he had been looking into a mirror after he had done some dreadful thing.
He winced, and, taking up from the table an oval glass framed in ivory Cupids, one of Lord Henry's many presents to him, glanced hurriedly into its polished depths.
No line like that warped his red lips.
What did it mean?
He rubbed his eyes, and came close to the picture, and examined it again.
There were no signs of any change when he looked into the actual painting, and yet there was no doubt that the whole expression had altered.
It was not a mere fancy of his own. The thing was horribly apparent.
He threw himself into a chair, and began to think.
Suddenly there flashed across his mind what he had said in Basil Hallward's studio the day the picture had been finished.
Yes, he remembered it perfectly.
He had uttered a mad wish that he himself might remain young, and the portrait grow old; that his own beauty might be untarnished, and the face on the canvas bear the burden of his passions and his sins; that the painted image might be seared with the lines of suffering and thought, and that he might keep all the delicate bloom and loveliness of his then just conscious boyhood.
Surely his wish had not been fulfilled?
Such things were impossible.
It seemed monstrous even to think of them.
And, yet, there was the picture before him, with the touch of cruelty in the mouth.
Cruelty!
Had he been cruel?
It was the girl's fault, not his.
He had dreamed of her as a great artist, had given his love to her because he had thought her great.
Then she had disappointed him.
She had been shallow and unworthy.
And, yet, a feeling of infinite regret came over him, as he thought of her lying at his feet sobbing like a little child. He remembered with what callousness he had watched her.
Why had he been made like that? Why had such a soul been given to him?
But he had suffered also.
During the three terrible hours that the play had lasted, he had lived centuries of pain, ?on upon ?on of torture.
His life was well worth hers.
She had marred him for a moment, if he had wounded her for an age.
Besides, women were better suited to bear sorrow than men.
They lived on their emotions. They only thought of their emotions.
When they took lovers, it was merely to have someone with whom they could have scenes.
Lord Henry had told him that, and Lord Henry knew what women were.
Why should he trouble about Sibyl Vane?
She was nothing to him now.
But the picture?
What was he to say of that?
It held the secret of his life, and told his story.
It had taught him to love his own beauty. Would it teach him to loathe his own soul?
Would he ever look at it again?
No; it was merely an illusion wrought on the troubled senses.
The horrible night that he had passed had left phantoms behind it.
Suddenly there had fallen upon his brain that tiny scarlet speck that makes men mad.
The picture had not changed. It was folly to think so.
Yet it was watching him, with its beautiful marred face and its cruel smile.
Its bright hair gleamed in the early sunlight. Its blue eyes met his own.