We must keep our heads."
"I thought you loved me…"
"Of course I love you," he said tenderly. "You surely can't have any doubt of that now."
"If she won't divorce you Walter will make you co-respondent."
He took an appreciable time to answer.
His tone was dry.
"Of course that would ruin my career, but I'm afraid it wouldn't do you much good.
If the worst came to the worst I should make a clean breast* of it to Dorothy; she'd be dreadfully hurt and wretched, but she'd forgive me." He had an idea. "I'm not sure if the best plan wouldn't be to make a clean breast of it anyhow.
If she went to your husband I daresay she could persuade him to hold his tongue."
"Does that mean you don't want her to divorce you?"
"Well, I have got my boys to think of, haven't I?
And naturally I don't want to make her unhappy.
We've always got on very well together.
She's been an awfully good wife to me, you know."
"Why did you tell me that she meant nothing to you?"
"I never did.
I said I wasn't in love with her.
We haven't slept together for years except now and then, on Christmas Day for instance, or the day before she was going home or the day she came back.
She isn't a woman who cares for that sort of thing.
But we've always been excellent friends.
I don't mind telling you that I depend on her more than any one has any idea of."
"Don't you think it would have been better to leave me alone then?"
She found it strange that with terror catching her breath she could speak so calmly.
"You were the loveliest little thing I'd seen for years.
I just fell madly in love with you.
You can't blame me for that."
"After all, you said you'd never let me down."
"But, good God, I'm not going to let you down.
We've got in an awful scrape and I'm going to do everything that's humanly possible to get you out of it."
"Except the one obvious and natural thing."
He stood up and returned to his own chair.
"My dear, you must be reasonable.
We'd much better face the situation frankly.
I don't want to hurt your feelings, but really I must tell you the truth.
I'm very keen on my career. There's no reason why I shouldn't be a Governor one of these days, and it's a damned soft* job to be a Colonial Governor.
Unless we can hush this up I don't stand a dog's chance.
I may not have to leave the service, but there always be a black mark against me.
If I do have to leave the service then I must go into business in China where I know people.
In either case my only chance is for Dorothy to stick to me."
"Was it necessary to tell me that you wanted nothing in the world but me?"
The corners of his mouth dropped peevishly.
"Oh, my dear, it's rather hard to take quite literally the things a man says when he's in love with you."
"Didn't you mean them?"
"At the moment."
"And what's to happen to me if Walter divorces me?"
"If we really haven't a leg to stand on* of course we won't defend.
There shouldn't be any publicity and people are pretty broad-minded nowadays."
For the first time Kitty thought of her mother.
She shivered.
She looked again at Townsend.