They went to work, and Fred helped vigorously.
His spirits had risen, and he heartily enjoyed a good slip in the moist earth under the hedgerow, which soiled his perfect summer trousers.
Was it his successful onset which had elated him, or the satisfaction of helping Mary's father?
Something more.
The accidents of the morning had helped his frustrated imagination to shape an employment for himself which had several attractions.
I am not sure that certain fibres in Mr. Garth's mind had not resumed their old vibration towards the very end which now revealed itself to Fred.
For the effective accident is but the touch of fire where there is oil and tow; and it always appeared to Fred that the railway brought the needed touch.
But they went on in silence except when their business demanded speech.
At last, when they had finished and were walking away, Mr. Garth said—
"A young fellow needn't be a B. A. to do this sort of work, eh, Fred?"
"I wish I had taken to it before I had thought of being a B. A.," said Fred.
He paused a moment, and then added, more hesitatingly, "Do you think I am too old to learn your business, Mr. Garth?"
"My business is of many sorts, my boy," said Mr. Garth, smiling.
"A good deal of what I know can only come from experience: you can't learn it off as you learn things out of a book.
But you are young enough to lay a foundation yet."
Caleb pronounced the last sentence emphatically, but paused in some uncertainty.
He had been under the impression lately that Fred had made up his mind to enter the Church.
"You do think I could do some good at it, if I were to try?" said Fred, more eagerly.
"That depends," said Caleb, turning his head on one side and lowering his voice, with the air of a man who felt himself to be saying something deeply religious.
"You must be sure of two things: you must love your work, and not be always looking over the edge of it, wanting your play to begin.
And the other is, you must not be ashamed of your work, and think it would be more honorable to you to be doing something else.
You must have a pride in your own work and in learning to do it well, and not be always saying, There's this and there's that—if I had this or that to do, I might make something of it.
No matter what a man is—I wouldn't give twopence for him"—here Caleb's mouth looked bitter, and he snapped his fingers—"whether he was the prime minister or the rick-thatcher, if he didn't do well what he undertook to do."
"I can never feel that I should do that in being a clergyman," said Fred, meaning to take a step in argument.
"Then let it alone, my boy," said Caleb, abruptly, "else you'll never be easy.
Or, if you are easy, you'll be a poor stick."
"That is very nearly what Mary thinks about it," said Fred, coloring.
"I think you must know what I feel for Mary, Mr. Garth: I hope it does not displease you that I have always loved her better than any one else, and that I shall never love any one as I love her."
The expression of Caleb's face was visibly softening while Fred spoke.
But he swung his head with a solemn slowness, and said—
"That makes things more serious, Fred, if you want to take Mary's happiness into your keeping."
"I know that, Mr. Garth," said Fred, eagerly, "and I would do anything for her.
She says she will never have me if I go into the Church; and I shall be the most miserable devil in the world if I lose all hope of Mary.
Really, if I could get some other profession, business—anything that I am at all fit for, I would work hard, I would deserve your good opinion.
I should like to have to do with outdoor things.
I know a good deal about land and cattle already.
I used to believe, you know—though you will think me rather foolish for it—that I should have land of my own.
I am sure knowledge of that sort would come easily to me, especially if I could be under you in any way."
"Softly, my boy," said Caleb, having the image of "Susan" before his eyes.
"What have you said to your father about all this?"
"Nothing, yet; but I must tell him.
I am only waiting to know what I can do instead of entering the Church.
I am very sorry to disappoint him, but a man ought to be allowed to judge for himself when he is four-and-twenty.
How could I know when I was fifteen, what it would be right for me to do now?
My education was a mistake."
"But hearken to this, Fred," said Caleb.
"Are you sure Mary is fond of you, or would ever have you?"
"I asked Mr. Farebrother to talk to her, because she had forbidden me—I didn't know what else to do," said Fred, apologetically.
"And he says that I have every reason to hope, if I can put myself in an honorable position—I mean, out of the Church.
I dare say you think it unwarrantable in me, Mr. Garth, to be troubling you and obtruding my own wishes about Mary, before I have done anything at all for myself.