Because it's a secret: he said himself it was a secret. Alyosha, darling, go to him and find out what their secret is and come and tell me," Grushenka besought him with sudden eagerness. "Set my mind at rest that I may know the worst that's in store for me.
That's why I sent for you."
"You think it's something to do with you?
If it were, he wouldn't have told you there was a secret."
"I don't know.
Perhaps he wants to tell me, but doesn't dare to.
He warns me.
There is a secret, he tells me, but he won't tell me what it is."
"What do you think yourself?"
"What do I think?
It's the end for me, that's what I think.
They all three have been plotting my end, for Katerina's in it.
It's all Katerina, it all comes from her.
She is this and that, and that means that I am not.
He tells me that beforehand- warns me.
He is planning to throw me over, that's the whole secret.
They've planned it together, the three of them- Mitya, Katerina, and Ivan Fyodorovitch.
Alyosha, I've been wanting to ask you a long time. A week ago he suddenly told me that Ivan was in love with Katerina, because he often goes to see her.
Did he tell me the truth or not?
Tell me, on your conscience, tell me the worst."
"I won't tell you a lie.
Ivan is not in love with Katerina Ivanovna, I think."
"Oh, that's what I thought!
He is lying to me, shameless deceiver, that's what it is!
And he was jealous of me just now, so as to put the blame on me afterwards.
He is stupid, he can't disguise what he is doing; he is so open, you know.... But I'll give it to him, I'll give it to him!
'You believe I did it,' he said. He said that to me, to me. He reproached me with that!
God forgive him!
You wait, I'll make it hot for Katerina at the trial!
I'll just say a word then... I'll tell everything then!"
And again she cried bitterly.
"This I can tell you for certain, Grushenka," Alyosha said, getting up. "First, that he loves you, loves you more than anyone in the world, and you only, believe me.
I know.
I do know.
The second thing is that I don't want to worm his secret out of him, but if he'll tell me of himself to-day, I shall tell him straight out that I have promised to tell you.
Then I'll come to you to-day and tell you.
Only... I fancy... Katerina Ivanovna has nothing to do with it, and that the secret is about something else.
That's certain.
It isn't likely it's about Katerina Ivanovna, it seems to me.
Good-bye for now."
Alyosha shook hands with her.
Grushenka was still crying.
He saw that she put little faith in his consolation, but she was better for having had her sorrow out, for having spoken of it.
He was sorry to leave her in such a state of mind, but he was in haste.
He had a great many things to do still.
Chapter 2.
The Injured Foot
THE first of these things was at the house of Madame Hohlakov, and he hurried there to get it over as quickly as possible and not be too late for Mitya.
Madame Hohlakov had been slightly ailing for the last three weeks: her foot had for some reason swollen up, and though she was not in bed, she lay all day half-reclining on the couch in her boudoir, in a fascinating but decorous deshabille.
Alyosha had once noted with innocent amusement that, in spite of her illness, Madame Hohlakov had begun to be rather dressy- topknots, ribbons, loose wrappers had made their appearance, and he had an inkling of the reason, though he dismissed such ideas from his mind as frivolous.