But ever since, the Poles had attached themselves to Grushenka and bombarded her daily with requests for money and she had always sent them small sums.
And now that day Mitya had taken it into his head to be fearfully jealous.
"Like a fool, I went round to him just for a minute, on the way to see Mitya, for he is ill, too, my Pole," Grushenka began again with nervous haste. "I was laughing, telling Mitya about it. 'Fancy,' I said, 'my Pole had the happy thought to sing his old songs to me to the guitar. He thought I would be touched and marry him!'
Mitya leapt up swearing.... So, there, I'll send them the pies!
Fenya, is it that little girl they've sent?
Here, give her three roubles and pack up a dozen pies in a paper and tell her to take them. And you, Alyosha, be sure to tell Mitya that I did send them the pies."
"I wouldn't tell him for anything," said Alyosha, smiling.
"Ech! You think he is unhappy about it. Why, he's jealous on purpose. He doesn't care," said Grushenka bitterly.
"On purpose?" queried Alyosha.
"I tell you you are silly, Alyosha. You know nothing about it, with all your cleverness.
I am not offended that he is jealous of a girl like me. I would be offended if he were not jealous.
I am like that.
I am not offended at jealousy. I have a fierce heart, too. I can be jealous myself.
Only what offends me is that he doesn't love me at all. I tell you he is jealous now on purpose.
Am I blind? Don't I see?
He began talking to me just now of that woman, of Katerina, saying she was this and that, how she had ordered a doctor from Moscow for him, to try and save him; how she had ordered the best counsel, the most learned one, too.
So he loves her, if he'll praise her to my face, more shame to him!
He's treated me badly himself, so he attacked me, to make out I am in fault first and to throw it all on me. 'You were with your Pole before me, so I can't be blamed for Katerina,' that's what it amounts to.
He wants to throw the whole blame on me.
He attacked me on purpose, on purpose, I tell you, but I'll-"
Grushenka could not finish saying what she would do. She hid her eyes in her handkerchief and sobbed violently.
"He doesn't love Katerina Ivanovna," said Alyosha firmly.
"Well, whether he loves her or not, I'll soon find out for myself," said Grushenka, with a menacing note in her voice, taking the handkerchief from her eyes.
Her face was distorted.
Alyosha saw sorrowfully that from being mild and serene, it had become sullen and spiteful.
"Enough of this foolishness," she said suddenly; "it's not for that I sent for you.
Alyosha, darling, to-morrow- what will happen to-morrow?
That's what worries me!
And it's only me it worries!
I look at everyone and no one is thinking of it. No one cares about it.
Are you thinking about it even?
To-morrow he'll be tried, you know.
Tell me, how will he be tried?
You know it's the valet, the valet killed him!
Good heavens!
Can they condemn him in place of the valet and will no one stand up for him?
They haven't troubled the valet at all, have they?"
"He's been severely cross-examined," observed Alyosha thoughtfully; "but everyone came to the conclusion it was not he.
Now he is lying very ill.
He has been ill ever since that attack.
Really ill," added Alyosha.
"Oh, dear! couldn't you go to that counsel yourself and tell him the whole thing by yourself?
He's been brought from Petersburg for three thousand roubles, they say."
"We gave these three thousand together- Ivan, Katerina Ivanovna and I- but she paid two thousand for the doctor from Moscow herself.
The counsel Fetyukovitch would have charged more, but the case has become known all over Russia; it's talked of in all the papers and journals. Fetyukovitch agreed to come more for the glory of the thing, because the case has become so notorious.
I saw him yesterday."
"Well?
Did you talk to him?" Grushenka put in eagerly.
"He listened and said nothing.
He told me that he had already formed his opinion.