"Well, I could admit some excuse for letting her leave you, provided she kept to herself. But to go attended by a cavalier—that makes a difference."
"Not a bit.
Suppose, as I believe, she would rather endure her present misery than be made to promise to keep apart from him?
All that is a question for herself.
It is not the same thing at all as the treachery of living on with a husband and playing him false… However, she has not distinctly implied living with him as wife, though I think she means to And to the best of my understanding it is not an ignoble, merely animal, feeling between the two: that is the worst of it; because it makes me think their affection will be enduring.
I did not mean to confess to you that in the first jealous weeks of my marriage, before I had come to my right mind, I hid myself in the school one evening when they were together there, and I heard what they said.
I am ashamed of it now, though I suppose I was only exercising a legal right.
I found from their manner that an extraordinary affinity, or sympathy, entered into their attachment, which somehow took away all flavour of grossness.
Their supreme desire is to be together—to share each other's emotions, and fancies, and dreams."
"Platonic!"
"Well no.
Shelleyan would be nearer to it.
They remind me of—what are their names—Laon and Cythna.
Also of Paul and Virginia a little.
The more I reflect, the more entirely I am on their side!"
"But if people did as you want to do, there'd be a general domestic disintegration.
The family would no longer be the social unit."
"Yes—I am all abroad, I suppose!" said Phillotson sadly.
"I was never a very bright reasoner, you remember. … And yet, I don't see why the woman and the children should not be the unit without the man."
"By the Lord Harry!—Matriarchy! … Does she say all this too?"
"Oh no.
She little thinks I have out-Sued Sue in this—all in the last twelve hours!"
"It will upset all received opinion hereabout.
Good God—what will Shaston say!"
"I don't say that it won't.
I don't know—I don't know! … As I say, I am only a feeler, not a reasoner."
"Now," said Gillingham, "let us take it quietly, and have something to drink over it."
He went under the stairs, and produced a bottle of cider-wine, of which they drank a rummer each.
"I think you are rafted, and not yourself," he continued.
"Do go back and make up your mind to put up with a few whims.
But keep her.
I hear on all sides that she's a charming young thing."
"Ah yes!
That's the bitterness of it!
Well, I won't stay. I have a long walk before me."
Gillingham accompanied his friend a mile on his way, and at parting expressed his hope that this consultation, singular as its subject was, would be the renewal of their old comradeship.
"Stick to her!" were his last words, flung into the darkness after Phillotson; from which his friend answered
"Aye, aye!"
But when Phillotson was alone under the clouds of night, and no sound was audible but that of the purling tributaries of the Stour, he said,
"So Gillingham, my friend, you had no stronger arguments against it than those!"
"I think she ought to be smacked, and brought to her senses—that's what I think!" murmured Gillingham, as he walked back alone.
The next morning came, and at breakfast Phillotson told Sue:
"You may go—with whom you will.
I absolutely and unconditionally agree."
Having once come to this conclusion it seemed to Phillotson more and more indubitably the true one.
His mild serenity at the sense that he was doing his duty by a woman who was at his mercy almost overpowered his grief at relinquishing her.
Some days passed, and the evening of their last meal together had come—a cloudy evening with wind—which indeed was very seldom absent in this elevated place.
How permanently it was imprinted upon his vision; that look of her as she glided into the parlour to tea; a slim flexible figure; a face, strained from its roundness, and marked by the pallors of restless days and nights, suggesting tragic possibilities quite at variance with her times of buoyancy; a trying of this morsel and that, and an inability to eat either.
Her nervous manner, begotten of a fear lest he should be injured by her course, might have been interpreted by a stranger as displeasure that Phillotson intruded his presence on her for the few brief minutes that remained.
"You had better have a slice of ham or an egg, or something with your tea?