Oscar Wilde Fullscreen How important it is to be serious (1895)

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Gwendolen!

Darling! [Offers to kiss her.]

Gwendolen. [Draws back.] A moment!

May I ask if you are engaged to be married to this young lady? [Points to Cecily.]

Jack. [Laughing.] To dear little Cecily!

Of course not!

What could have put such an idea into your pretty little head?

Gwendolen.

Thank you.

You may! [Offers her cheek.]

Cecily. [Very sweetly.] I knew there must be some misunderstanding, Miss Fairfax.

The gentleman whose arm is at present round your waist is my guardian, Mr. John Worthing.

Gwendolen.

I beg your pardon?

Cecily.

This is Uncle Jack.

Gwendolen. [Receding.] Jack!

Oh!

[Enter Algernon.]

Cecily.

Here is Ernest.

Algernon. [Goes straight over to Cecily without noticing any one else.] My own love! [Offers to kiss her.]

Cecily. [Drawing back.] A moment, Ernest!

May I ask you - are you engaged to be married to this young lady?

Algernon. [Looking round.] To what young lady?

Good heavens! Gwendolen!

Cecily.

Yes! to good heavens, Gwendolen, I mean to Gwendolen.

Algernon. [Laughing.] Of course not!

What could have put such an idea into your pretty little head?

Cecily.

Thank you. [Presenting her cheek to be kissed.] You may.

[Algernon kisses her.]

Gwendolen.

I felt there was some slight error, Miss Cardew.

The gentleman who is now embracing you is my cousin, Mr. Algernon Moncrieff.

Cecily. [Breaking away from Algernon.] Algernon Moncrieff!

Oh!

[The two girls move towards each other and put their arms round each other's waists protection.]

Cecily.

Are you called Algernon?

Algernon.

I cannot deny it.

Cecily.

Oh!

Gwendolen.

Is your name really John?

Jack. [Standing rather proudly.] I could deny it if I liked.

I could deny anything if I liked.

But my name certainly is John.