Merriman.
Yes, sir.
Three portmanteaus, a dressing-case, two hat- boxes, and a large luncheon-basket.
Algernon.
I am afraid I can't stay more than a week this time.
Jack.
Merriman, order the dog-cart at once.
Mr. Ernest has been suddenly called back to town.
Merriman.
Yes, sir. [Goes back into the house.]
Algernon.
What a fearful liar you are, Jack.
I have not been called back to town at all.
Jack.
Yes, you have.
Algernon.
I haven't heard any one call me.
Jack.
Your duty as a gentleman calls you back.
Algernon.
My duty as a gentleman has never interfered with my pleasures in the smallest degree.
Jack.
I can quite understand that.
Algernon.
Well, Cecily is a darling.
Jack.
You are not to talk of Miss Cardew like that.
I don't like it.
Algernon.
Well, I don't like your clothes.
You look perfectly ridiculous in them.
Why on earth don't you go up and change?
It is perfectly childish to be in deep mourning for a man who is actually staying for a whole week with you in your house as a guest.
I call it grotesque.
Jack.
You are certainly not staying with me for a whole week as a guest or anything else.
You have got to leave... by the four-five train.
Algernon.
I certainly won't leave you so long as you are in mourning.
It would be most unfriendly.
If I were in mourning you would stay with me, I suppose.
I should think it very unkind if you didn't.
Jack.
Well, will you go if I change my clothes?
Algernon.
Yes, if you are not too long.
I never saw anybody take so long to dress, and with such little result.
Jack.
Well, at any rate, that is better than being always over- dressed as you are.
Algernon.