When we got back again, and he lifted me out, and carried me—so easily!—across the court and up the stairs, I thought of that eventful Christmas Day when he had carried me over the marshes.
We had not yet made any allusion to my change of fortune, nor did I know how much of my late history he was acquainted with.
I was so doubtful of myself now, and put so much trust in him, that I could not satisfy myself whether I ought to refer to it when he did not.
"Have you heard, Joe," I asked him that evening, upon further consideration, as he smoked his pipe at the window, "who my patron was?"
"I heerd," returned Joe, "as it were not Miss Havisham, old chap."
"Did you hear who it was, Joe?"
"Well! I heerd as it were a person what sent the person what giv' you the bank-notes at the Jolly Bargemen, Pip."
"So it was."
"Astonishing!" said Joe, in the placidest way.
"Did you hear that he was dead, Joe?" I presently asked, with increasing diffidence.
"Which?
Him as sent the bank-notes, Pip?"
"Yes."
"I think," said Joe, after meditating a long time, and looking rather evasively at the window-seat, "as I did hear tell that how he were something or another in a general way in that direction."
"Did you hear anything of his circumstances, Joe?"
"Not partickler, Pip."
"If you would like to hear, Joe—" I was beginning, when Joe got up and came to my sofa.
"Lookee here, old chap," said Joe, bending over me.
"Ever the best of friends; ain't us, Pip?"
I was ashamed to answer him.
"Wery good, then," said Joe, as if I had answered; "that's all right; that's agreed upon.
Then why go into subjects, old chap, which as betwixt two sech must be for ever onnecessary?
There's subjects enough as betwixt two sech, without onnecessary ones.
Lord!
To think of your poor sister and her Rampages!
And don't you remember Tickler?"
"I do indeed, Joe."
"Lookee here, old chap," said Joe.
"I done what I could to keep you and Tickler in sunders, but my power were not always fully equal to my inclinations.
For when your poor sister had a mind to drop into you, it were not so much," said Joe, in his favorite argumentative way, "that she dropped into me too, if I put myself in opposition to her, but that she dropped into you always heavier for it.
I noticed that.
It ain't a grab at a man's whisker, not yet a shake or two of a man (to which your sister was quite welcome), that 'ud put a man off from getting a little child out of punishment.
But when that little child is dropped into heavier for that grab of whisker or shaking, then that man naterally up and says to himself,
'Where is the good as you are a doing?
I grant you I see the 'arm,' says the man, 'but I don't see the good.
I call upon you, sir, therefore, to pint out the good.'"
"The man says?" I observed, as Joe waited for me to speak.
"The man says," Joe assented.
"Is he right, that man?"
"Dear Joe, he is always right."
"Well, old chap," said Joe, "then abide by your words.
If he's always right (which in general he's more likely wrong), he's right when he says this: Supposing ever you kep any little matter to yourself, when you was a little child, you kep it mostly because you know'd as J.
Gargery's power to part you and Tickler in sunders were not fully equal to his inclinations.
Theerfore, think no more of it as betwixt two sech, and do not let us pass remarks upon onnecessary subjects.
Biddy giv' herself a deal o' trouble with me afore I left (for I am almost awful dull), as I should view it in this light, and, viewing it in this light, as I should so put it.
Both of which," said Joe, quite charmed with his logical arrangement, "being done, now this to you a true friend, say.
Namely.
You mustn't go a overdoing on it, but you must have your supper and your wine and water, and you must be put betwixt the sheets."
The delicacy with which Joe dismissed this theme, and the sweet tact and kindness with which Biddy—who with her woman's wit had found me out so soon—had prepared him for it, made a deep impression on my mind.
But whether Joe knew how poor I was, and how my great expectations had all dissolved, like our own marsh mists before the sun, I could not understand.