He also ran errands for the ward and in his spare time made me a cigarette lighter out of an empty Austrian rifle cartridge.
The doctors were very nice and seemed very capable.
They were anxious to ship me to Milan where there were better X-ray facilities and where, after the operation, I could take mechano-therapy. I wanted to go to Milan too.
They wanted to get us all out and back as far as possible because all the beds were needed for the offensive, when it should start.
The night before I left the field hospital Rinaldi came in to see me with the major from our mess.
They said that I would go to an American hospital in Milan that had just been installed.
Some American ambulance units were to be sent down and this hospital would look after them and any other Americans on service in Italy.
There were many in the Red Cross.
The States had declared war on Germany but not on Austria.
The Italians were sure America would declare war on Austria too and they were very excited about any Americans coming down, even the Red Cross.
They asked me if I thought President Wilson would declare war on Austria and I said it was only a matter of days.
I did not know what we had against Austria but it seemed logical that they should declare war on her if they did on Germany.
They asked me if we would declare war on Turkey.
I said that was doubtful. Turkey, I said, was our national bird but the joke translated so badly and they were so puzzled and suspicious that I said yes, we would probably declare war on Turkey.
And on Bulgaria?
We had drunk several glasses of brandy and I said yes by God on Bulgaria too and on Japan.
But, they said, Japan is an ally of England.
You can't trust the bloody English.
The Japanese want Hawaii, I said.
Where is Hawaii?
It is in the Pacific Ocean.
Why do the Japanese want it?
They don't really want it, I said.
That is all talk.
The Japanese are a wonderful little people fond of dancing and light wines.
Like the French, said the major.
We will get Nice and Savoia from the French.
We will get Corsica and all the Adriatic coast-line, Rinaldi said.
Italy will return to the splendors of Rome, said the major.
I don't like Rome, I said.
It is hot and full of fleas.
You don't like Rome?
Yes, I love Rome.
Rome is the mother of nations.
I will never forget Romulus suckling the Tiber.
What?
Nothing.
Let's all go to Rome.
Let's go to Rome to-night and never come back.
Rome is a beautiful city, said the major.
The mother and father of nations, I said.
Roma is feminine, said Rinaldi.
It cannot be the father.
Who is the father, then, the Holy Ghost?
Don't blaspheme.
I wasn't blaspheming, I was asking for information.
You are drunk, baby.
Who made me drunk?
I made you drunk, said the major.
I made you drunk because I love you and because America is in the war.