Sofya Matveyevna stammered in alarm that she must hurry on.
"You've no need to hurry.
I'll buy all your books, and meantime you stay here.
Hold your tongue; don't make excuses.
If I hadn't come you would have stayed with him all the same, wouldn't you?"
"I wouldn't have left him on any account," Sofya Matveyevna brought out softly and firmly, wiping her tears.
It was late at night when Doctor Salzfish was brought.
He was a very respectable old man and a practitioner of fairly wide experience who had recently lost his post in the service in consequence of some quarrel on a point of honour with his superiors.
Varvara Petrovna instantly and actively took him under her protection.
He examined the patient attentively, questioned him, and cautiously pronounced to Varvara Petrovna that "the sufferer's" condition was highly dubious in consequence of complications, and that they must be prepared "even for the worst."
Varvara Petrovna, who had during twenty years got accustomed to expecting nothing serious or decisive to come from Stepan Trofimovitch, was deeply moved and even turned pale.
"Is there really no hope?"
"Can there ever be said to be absolutely no hope? But..."
She did not go to bed all night, and felt that the morning would never come.
As soon as the patient opened his eyes and returned to consciousness (he was conscious all the time, however, though he was growing weaker every hour), she went up to him with a very resolute air.
"Stepan Trofimovitch, one must be prepared for anything.
I've sent for a priest.
You must do what is right...."
Knowing his convictions, she was terribly afraid of his refusing.
He looked at her with surprise.
"Nonsense, nonsense!" she vociferated, thinking he was already refusing.
"This is no time for whims.
You have played the fool enough."
"But... am I really so ill, then?"
He agreed thoughtfully.
And indeed I was much surprised to learn from Varvara Petrovna afterwards that he showed no fear of death at all.
Possibly it was that he simply did not believe it, and still looked upon his illness as a trifling one.
He confessed and took the sacrament very readily.
Every one, Sofya Matveyevna, and even the servants, came to congratulate him on taking the sacrament.
They were all moved to tears looking at his sunken and exhausted face and his blanched and quivering lips.
"Oui, mes amis, and I only wonder that you... take so much trouble.
I shall most likely get up to-morrow, and we will... set off.... Toute cette ceremonie... for which, of course, I feel every proper respect... was..."
"I beg you, father, to remain with the invalid," said Varvara Petrovna hurriedly, stopping the priest, who had already taken off his vestments.
"As soon as tea has been handed, I beg you to begin to speak of religion, to support his faith."
The priest spoke; every one was standing or sitting round the sick-bed.
"In our sinful days," the priest began smoothly, with a cup of tea in his hand, "faith in the Most High is the sole refuge of the race of man in all the trials and tribulations of life, as well as its hope for that eternal bliss promised to the righteous."
Stepan Trofimovitch seemed to revive, a subtle smile strayed on his lips.
"Mon pere, je vous remercie et vous etes bien bon, mais..."
"No mais about it, no mais at all!" exclaimed Varvara Petrovna, bounding up from her chair.
"Father," she said, addressing the priest, "he is a man who... he is a man who... You will have to confess him again in another hour!
That's the sort of man he is."
Stepan Trofimovitch smiled faintly.
"My friends," he said, "God is necessary to me, if only because He is the only being whom one can love eternally."
Whether he was really converted, or whether the stately ceremony of the administration of the sacrament had impressed him and stirred the artistic responsiveness of his temperament or not, he firmly and, I am told, with great feeling uttered some words which were in flat contradiction with many of his former convictions.
"My immortality is necessary if only because God will not be guilty of injustice and extinguish altogether the flame of love for Him once kindled in my heart.
And what is more precious than love?
Love is higher than existence, love is the crown of existence; and how is it possible that existence should not be under its dominance?
If I have once loved Him and rejoiced in my love, is it possible that He should extinguish me and my joy and bring me to nothingness again?
If there is a God, then I am immortal.
Voila ma profession de foi."