"I adore thee."
She, of all your sex, will be the only one worthy to pronounce that word.
Then shall I truly be the god of her idolatry.
Confess ingenuously to me, that in our arrangements, as indifferent as they are free, what we style happiness scarce deserves the name of pleasure.
I'll freely acknowledge, I imagined my heart withered, and incapable only of sensual gratification; I began to deplore my prematurely advanced age; Madame de Tourvel has restored me to the illusive charms of youth.
With her, actual enjoyment is not necessary to my happiness.
The only thing that alarms me is the time this adventure will take up; for I am resolved to risk nothing.
In vain do I bring to remembrance my successful acts of temerity on many occasions; I can't think of attempting them now.
To crown my bliss, she must give herself up, and that's not an easy matter to accomplish.
I am confident even you must approve my discretion, for as yet I have not mentioned the word love; but we are already got as far as those of friendship and confidence.
In order to deceive her as little as possible, and, above all, to guard against any thing that may come to her knowledge which might shock her, I have myself related to her, by way of self-accusation, some of my most remarkable adventures.
You would be delighted to see how innocently she catechises me.
She says she is determined to make a convert of me: but has not the least suspicion how much the purchase will cost her.
She does not think, that her becoming advocate, to use her own words, for the many I have undone, she is beforehand pleading her own cause.
This idea struck me yesterday, in the midst of one of her little sermons, and I could not resist the pleasure of interrupting her, to tell her that she spoke like a prophet.
Adieu, my lovely friend! you see I am not totally lost.
P. S.
But what's become of our poor Chevalier? Has he destroyed himself in a fit of despair?
Indeed you are a million of times worse than I; and if I was vain, you'd mortify me to be so much outdone.
From the Castle of ——, Aug. 9, 17—. _____
LETTER VII.
CECILIA VOLANGES to SOPHIA CARNAY. _____
If I have not said any thing to you as yet of my marriage, it is because I am as ignorant of the matter as the first day I came home.
I begin to accustom myself not to think about it, and I am very happy as I am.
I practice my harpsichord and singing much; and I am fonder of them than when I had a master, or rather now I have got a better one.
The Chevalier Danceny, the gentleman I mentioned to you before, with whom I sang at Madame Merteuil's, is so obliging to come every day to sing with me for hours together.
He is exceedingly agreeable. He sings like an angel, and sets the words of his own composition to very pretty music.
It is a great pity he is a Knight of Malta!
I think, were he to embark in wedlock, his wife would be very happy.
He is the sweetest creature breathing.
Without the affectation of complaisance, every thing he does is endearing.
He always chides me about music, or some other trifle; but he blends with his censures so much concern and good nature, that one can't help being pleased.
His very looks seem to speak obliging things.
And with all this, he is the most complaisant man possible: for instance; yesterday he was asked to a private concert, but spent the evening at Mamma's, which gratified me exceedingly; for, when he is absent, I have no one to speak to, and am quite stupid: but, when he is with us, we chat and sing together, and he always has something to say to me.
Madame de Merteuil and he are the only two amiable persons I yet know.
Adieu, my dear friend! I promised to be perfect to-day in a little air, with a very difficult accompaniment, and I must keep my word.
I must set about practising it against his return.
From ——, Aug. 7, 17—. _____
LETTER VIII.
Presidente DE TOURVEL to MADAME DE VOLANGES. _____
Permit me, Madam, to assure you, no one can be more sensible of the confidence you repose in me, nor have more at heart the happy establishment of Mademoiselle de Volanges than I have.
With my whole soul I wish her that felicity which I am confident she merits, and which I have no doubt she will obtain through your prudence.
I have not the honour of knowing Count Gercourt, but conceive the most favourable opinion of him, as he is your choice.
I limit my good wishes to the hope that this match may be as happy as mine, which was also one of your making, and which gratitude daily calls to my remembrance.
May the happiness of Mademoiselle de Volanges be the reward of that I enjoy, and may the best of friends be also the happiest of mothers!
I am really mortified that I am not at present able, personally, to assure you of the grateful sentiments of my heart, and to accomplish what I wish for much, an acquaintance with Mademoiselle de Volanges.
After having experienced your maternal fondness, I think I am entitled to the tender friendship of a sister from her.
I entreat you, Madam, to claim it for me, until I have it in my power to deserve it.
I propose residing in the country during Mr. de Tourvel's absence. I now enjoy and improve in the respectable company of Madame Rosemonde.
This lady is ever delightful; her great age has not the least impaired her gaiety or memory; her body may be eighty-four, but her understanding is only twenty.