He was at a very little distance from me, coming out of the Opera, and I gave a rendezvous to the Marquis de ———, to sup on Friday at the Lady Marechale's, so loud that he might hear, which, I believe, is the only house I can meet him in; and have not the least doubt but he heard me.
If the ungrateful wretch should not come—Tell me sincerely, do you think he will?
I protest if he does not, I shall be out of temper the whole evening.
You see he will not find so much difficulty in following me; and what will surprise you more is, he will find less, in pleasing me..
He says he will kill six horses in paying his addresses to me; oh! the poor animals shall not die.
I should never have patience to wait so long.
You know it is not my principle to make any one languish, when once I am decided in their favour, as I really am in his.
Now, you must agree, there is some pleasure in talking rationally to me, has not your important advice had great success; but what can I do?
I vegetate for a long time; it is more than six weeks since I have permitted myself a gaiety; this is the first, how can I refuse it?
Is not the subject worth the trouble?
Can there be any one more agreeable in every sense of the word?
You are obliged to do him justice; you do more than praise him; you are jealous of him.
Well, I shall judge between you both, but first I must take informations, and that is what I mean to do.
Be assured I shall be an upright judge; you shall be both weighed in the same scale; for your part, I have already received your memorial, am entirely acquainted with your affairs.
Is it not reasonable that I should also know your adversary's case?
Come, go through your business with a good grace, and to begin, inform me, I beg of you, this triple adventure, of which he is the hero.
You talk to me as if I knew the whole matter, who never heard a word of it.
Probably it happened during the time of my journey to Geneva, and your jealousy prevented you from giving me an account of it.
Repair this fault immediately; remember that every thing that interests him, is of consequence to me.
I think it was spoke of at my return; but I was so taken up with other matters, I rarely pay attention to any thing of this kind that is not new.
If what I require should be even contrary to your inclination, remember how much you are indebted to me for the cares and solicitude I have had upon your account.
Is it not to them you are indebted for being now with your Presidente, when your own folly drove you from her?
Have I not put it in your power to be revenged of Madame de Volanges, for her acrimonious zeal against you?
How often have you deplored the time you lost in search of adventures, now you have them at command?
Love, hatred, make your choice, they are under the same roof with you; by doubling your existence, you can caress with the one hand, and strike with the other.
It is to me even you are indebted, for the adventure of the Viscountess—It pleases me.
I agree with you it must be published, for if the opportunity influenced you, as I am apt to think, to prefer mystery to rumour; at that time must acknowledge, notwithstanding, this woman does not deserve so handsome a procedure.
Moreover, I have reason to dislike her; the Chevalier de Belleroche thinks her handsomer than me, and for several reasons I would be glad to break off with her; there is none more plausible than to have a story to relate, one cannot keep company with her after.
Farewell, Viscount!
Remember that as you are situated, time is precious: I will employ mine in thinking how to make Prevan happy.
Sept. 15, 17—. _____
LETTER LXXV.
CECILIA VOLANGES to SOPHIA CARNAY.
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[In this Letter, Cecilia Volanges gives a most circumstantial account of every thing that relates to herself, in the events which the reader has seen at the end of the first volume, the 59th Letter, and the following; for this reason a repetition was thought unnecessary; at last she speaks of Viscount de Valmont, and thus expresses herself:] _____
I assure you he is a very extraordinary man: my mamma speaks very ill of him, but the Chevalier Danceny is enamoured with him, and I believe he is in the right.
I never saw a man so artful; when he gave me Danceny's letter, it was amongst a good deal of company, and no one knew any thing of the matter.
It is true I was very much frightened, because I had no notion of any such thing, but hereafter I shall be on the watch.
I conceive, already, how he would have me return the answer; it is very easy to understand him, for he has an eye tells one every thing; I do not know how he contrives: he told me in the note which I mentioned to you, he would not seem to take any notice of me before mamma; really one would imagine he never thinks of it, and yet every time I want to look at him, I am sure to meet his eyes fixed upon me.
There is a lady here, also an intimate friend of mamma's, I did not know, who appears to me not to like Mr. de Valmont.
Although he seems to be all attention to her, I am afraid he will soon grow tired of this life, and return to Paris; that would be dreadful indeed!
He must be an exceeding good-natured man, to come here on purpose to serve his friend and me.
I wish to know how I could testify my gratitude; but I don't know how to speak to him; and if I even had the opportunity, I should be so ashamed I should not know what to say.
I cannot speak to any body freely, about my love affair, but Madame de Merteuil; perhaps even with thee, to whom I tell every thing, if it was in a chatting way, I should be abashed.
Even with Danceny himself, I have often felt, as it were, against my inclination, a kind of fear, which prevented me from saying every thing I could wish. I am very sorry for it now, and I would give any thing in the world for a moment, to tell him only once how much I love him.
Mr. de Valmont has promised him, if I will be ruled by him, he will find an opportunity for us to see each other.
I am very well inclined to do whatever he would have me; but I can't conceive how it is possible.
Farewell, my dear friend: I have no more room.(Mademoiselle de Volanges having a little time after changed her confidant, as will be seen in the following Letters, there will no more be given in this collection of those she continued to write to her friend in the convent).
From the Castle of ——, Sept. 14, 17—. _____
LETTER LXXVI.