LUKA.
Ah, Heaven save us from being in the educational department!
One's afraid of everything. Everybody meddles and wants to show that he is as clever as you.
GOVERNOR.
Oh, that's nothing. But this cursed incognito!
All of a sudden he'll look in:
"Ah, so you're here, my dear fellows!
And who's the judge here?" says he.
"Liapkin-Tiapkin."
"Bring Liapkin-Tiapkin here.—And who is the Superintendent of Charities?"
"Zemlianika."—"Bring Zemlianika here!"—That's what's bad.
SCENE II
Enter Ivan Kuzmich, the Postmaster.
POSTMASTER.
Tell me, gentlemen, who's coming? What chinovnik?
GOVERNOR.
What, haven't you heard?
POSTMASTER.
Bobchinsky told me.
He was at the postoffice just now.
GOVERNOR.
Well, what do you think of it?
POSTMASTER.
What do I think of it? Why, there'll be a war with the Turks.
AMMOS.
Exactly. Just what I thought.
GOVERNOR [sarcastically].
Yes, you've both hit in the air precisely.
POSTMASTER.
It's war with the Turks for sure, all fomented by the French.
GOVERNOR.
Nonsense! War with the Turks indeed.
It's we who are going to get it, not the Turks.
You may count on that. Here's a letter to prove it.
POSTMASTER.
In that case, then, we won't go to war with the Turks.
GOVERNOR.
Well, how do you feel about it, Ivan Kuzmich?
POSTMASTER.
How do I feel?
How do YOU feel about it, Anton Antonovich?
GOVERNOR.
I?
Well, I'm not afraid, but I just feel a little—you know—The merchants and townspeople bother me.
I seem to be unpopular with them. But the Lord knows if I've taken from some I've done it without a trace of ill-feeling.
I even suspect—[Takes him by the arm and walks aside with him.]—I even suspect that I may have been denounced.
Or why would they send an Inspector to us?
Look here, Ivan Kuzmich, don't you think you could—ahem!—just open a little every letter that passes through your office and read it—for the common benefit of us all, you know—to see if it contains any kind of information against me, or is only ordinary correspondence.
If it is all right, you can seal it up again, or simply deliver the letter opened.
POSTMASTER.