Is that clear?
I think a tighter bomb pattern is something really worth praying for.
It will be a feather in all our caps with General Peckem.
General Peckem feels it makes a much nicer aerial photograph when the bombs explode close together.’
‘General Peckem, sir?’
‘That’s right, Chaplain,’ the colonel replied, chuckling paternally at the chaplain’s look of puzzlement.
‘I wouldn’t want this to get around, but it looks like General Dreedle is finally on the way out and that General Peckem is slated to replace him.
Frankly, I’m not going to be sorry to see that happen.
General Peckem is a very good man, and I think we’ll all be much better off under him.
On the other hand, it might never take place, and we’d still remain under General Dreedle.
Frankly, I wouldn’t be sorry to see that happen either, because General Dreedle is another very good man, and I think we’ll all be much better off under him too.
I hope you’re going to keep all this under your hat, Chaplain.
I wouldn’t want either one to get the idea I was throwing my support on the side of the other.’
‘Yes, sir.’
‘That’s good,’ the colonel exclaimed, and stood up jovially.
‘But all this gossip isn’t getting us into The Saturday Evening Post, eh, Chaplain?
Let’s see what kind of procedure we can evolve.
Incidentally, Chaplain, not a word about this beforehand to Colonel Korn.
Understand?’ ‘Yes, sir.’
Colonel Cathcart began tramping back and forth reflectively in the narrow corridors left between his bushels of plum tomatoes and the desk and wooden chairs in the center of the room.
‘I suppose we’ll have to keep you waiting outside until the briefing is over, because all that information is classified.
We can slip you in while Major Danby is synchronizing the watches.
I don’t think there’s anything secret about the right time.
We’ll allocate about a minute and a half for you in the schedule.
Will a minute and a half be enough?’
‘Yes, sir.
If it doesn’t include the time necessary to excuse the atheists from the room and admit the enlisted men.’
Colonel Cathcart stopped in his tracks.
‘What atheists?’ he bellowed defensively, his whole manner changing in a flash to one of virtuous and belligerent denial.
‘There are no atheists in my outfit!
Atheism is against the law, isn’t it?’
‘No, sir.’
‘It isn’t?’ The colonel was surprised. ‘Then it’s un-American, isn’t it?’
‘I’m not sure, sir,’ answered the chaplain.
‘Well, I am!’ the colonel declared.
‘I’m not going to disrupt our religious services just to accommodate a bunch of lousy atheists.
They’re getting no special privileges fiom me.
They can stay right where they are and pray with the rest of us.
And what’s all this about enlisted men?
Just how the hell do they get into this act?’
The chaplain felt his face flush.
‘I’m sorry, sir. I just assumed you would want the enlisted men to be present, since they would be going along on the same mission.’
‘Well, I don’t.
They’ve got a God and a chaplain of their own, haven’t they?’
‘No, sir.’
‘What are you talking about?
You mean they pray to the same God we do?’
‘Yes, sir.’
‘And He listens?’
‘I think so, sir.’