Joseph Heller Fullscreen Amendment-22 Catch-22 (1961)

Pause

The village is built on such a steep incline that all the rubble from the houses and other buildings you destroy will certainly tumble right down and pile upon the road.’

‘What the hell difference will it make?’ Dunbar wanted to know, as Yossarian watched him excitedly with a mixture of awe and adulation.

‘It will only take them a couple of days to clear it.’

Major Danby was trying to avoid an argument.

‘Well, it apparently makes some difference to Headquarters,’ he answered in a conciliatory tone.

‘I suppose that’s why they ordered the mission.’

‘Have the people in the village been warned?’ asked McWatt.

Major Danby was dismayed that McWatt too was registering opposition.

‘No, I don’t think so.’

‘Haven’t we dropped any leaflets telling them that this time we’ll be flying over to hit them?’ asked Yossarian.

‘Can’t we even tip them off so they’ll get out of the way?’

‘No, I don’t think so.’

Major Danby was swearing some more and still shifting his eyes about uneasily.

‘The Germans might find out and choose another road.

I’m not sure about any of this.

I’m just making assumptions.’

‘They won’t even take shelter,’ Dunbar argued bitterly.

‘They’ll pour out into the streets to wave when they see our planes coming, all the children and dogs and old people.

Jesus Christ!

Why can’t we leave them alone?’

‘Why can’t we create the roadblock somewhere else?’ asked McWatt.

‘Why must it be there?’

‘I don’t know,’ Major Danby answered unhappily.

‘I don’t know. Look, fellows, we’ve got to have some confidence in the people above us who issue our orders. They know what they’re doing.’ ‘The hell they do,’ said Dunbar.

‘What’s the trouble?’ inquired Colonel Korn, moving leisurely across the briefing room with his hands in his pockets and his tan shirt baggy.

‘Oh, no trouble, Colonel,’ said Major Danby, trying nervously to cover up.

‘We’re just discussing the mission.’

‘They don’t want to bomb the village,’ Havermeyer snickered, giving Major Danby away.

‘You prick!’ Yossarian said to Havermeyer.

‘You leave Havermeyer alone,’ Colonel Korn ordered Yossarian curtly.

He recognized Yossarian as the drunk who had accosted him roughly at the officers’ club one night before the first mission to Bologna, and he swung his displeasure prudently to Dunbar.

‘Why don’t you want to bomb the village?’

‘It’s cruel, that’s why.’

‘Cruel?’ asked Colonel Korn with cold good humor, frightened only momentarily by the uninhibited vehemence of Dunbar’s hostility.

‘Would it be any less cruel to let those two German divisions down to fight with our troops?

American lives are at stake, too, you know.

Would you rather see American blood spilled?’

‘American blood is being spilled.

But those people are living up there in peace.

Why can’t we leave them the hell alone?’

‘Yes, it’s easy for you to talk,’ Colonel Korn jeered. ‘You’re safe here in Pianosa.

It won’t make any difference to you when these German reinforcements arrive, will it?’

Dunbar turned crimson with embarrassment and replied in a voice that was suddenly defensive.

‘Why can’t we create the roadblock somewhere else?

Couldn’t we bomb the slope of a mountain or the road itself?’

‘Would you rather go back to Bologna?’

The question, asked quietly, rang out like a shot and created a silence in the room that was awkward and menacing.

Yossarian prayed intensely, with shame, that Dunbar would keep his mouth shut.

Dunbar dropped his gaze, and Colonel Korn knew he had won.

‘No, I thought not,’ he continued with undisguised scorn.