“But it isn't Wednesday?”
“No, but time is different in Brazil, surely you remember.”
“I can't get as far as Pigstanton.
I've got to stay here until Messinger comes back.
I'm ill.
He told me to be quiet.
He's coming this evening.”
“But all the County Council are here: The Shameless Blonde brought them in her aeroplane.”
Sure enough they were all there.
Reggie St. Cloud was chairman.
He said,
“I strongly object to Milly being on the committee. She is a woman of low repute.”
Tony protested.
“She has a daughter.
She has as much right here as Lady Cockpurse.”
“Order,” said the Mayor. “I must ask you gentlemen to confine your remarks to the subject under discussion.
We have to decide about the widening of the Bayton-Pigstanton road.
There have been several complaints that it's impossible for the Green Line Buses to turn the corner safely at Hetton Cross.”
“Green Line rats.”
“I said Green Line rats.
Mechanical green line rats.
Many of the villagers have been scared by them and have evacuated their cottages.”
“I evacuated,” said Reggie St. Cloud.
“I was driven out of my house by mechanical green rats.”
“Order,” said Lady Cockpurse.
“I move that Mr. Last address the meeting.”
“Hear, hear.”
“Ladies and gentlemen,” said Tony. “I beg you to understand that I am ill and must not move from the hammock.
Dr. Messinger has given the clearest instructions.”
“Winnie wants to bathe.”
“No bathing in Brazil.
No bathing in Brazil.” The meeting took up the cry.
“No bathing in Brazil.”
“But you had two breakfasts.”
“Order,” said the Mayor.
“Lord St. Cloud, I suggest you put the question to the vote.”
“The question is whether the contract for the widening of the corner at Hetton Cross shall be given to Mrs. Beaver.
Of the tenders submitted hers was by far the most expensive but I understand that her plans included a chromium plated wall on the south side of the village …”
“… and two breakfasts,” prompted Winnie.
“… and two breakfasts for the men engaged on the work.
Those in favour of the motion will make a clucking sound in imitation of hens, those against will say bow-wow.”
“A most improper proceeding,” said Reggie. “What will the servants think?”
“We have got to do something until Brenda has been told.”
“… Me?
I'm all right.”
“Then I take it the motion is carried.”
“Oh, I am glad Mrs. Beaver got the job,” said Brenda.
“You see I'm in love with John Beaver, I'm in love with John Beaver, I'm in love with John Beaver.”
“Is that the decision of the committee?”
“Yes, she is in love with John Beaver.”